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What if Your Aging Adult Doesn’t Want Your Help?

Caregivers in Mt. Laurel NJ: What if Your Aging Adult Doesn't Want Your Help?

Caregivers in Mt. Laurel NJ: What if Your Aging Adult Doesn’t Want Your Help?

At some point on your caregiving journey, you’re going to realize that you can’t do it all on your own. When you decide it’s time to bring in extra help, it can be a shock to realize that your aging adult is not on board.

Stay Positive When You Bring up the Topic

If you’re focusing on the negatives, that’s not going to help, unfortunately. Pointing out your senior’s weaknesses or that she’s in need of assistance in order to thrive may not go far. Instead, focus on the fact that you are trying to be the best caregiver possible and that you need help in order to do that. You want to make sure that she has the best care available, which requires you to learn and grow. This isn’t untrue, it’s just reframing the situation.

List Benefits that Will Make Sense to Her

Some of the benefits that you think are most important may be ones your senior doesn’t care for even a tiny bit. That’s why you need to focus on benefits that do make sense to her life. If she often needs help getting up or reaching items that are out of reach for her, list those benefits. They may not be high on your list, but they can change your senior’s mind.

Don’t Force the Conversation, But Don’t Forget It

You may find that your senior doesn’t want any part of this conversation when you bring it up and that’s normal. Don’t try to force her to have the conversation when she actively doesn’t want to talk about it. Instead, back away for a time and remember to bring it up again later.

Look for Strong Opportunities

When you do bring up the topic of having elder care providers come in, make sure that you’re doing it when you have a high likelihood of getting somewhere with the talk. You need your aging family member to be in a good mood, feeling relaxed and happy, and you might want to have an opening gambit. One such segue could be a family member or friend who had excellent help when she needed it.

You may need to have this conversation more than once with your aging adult. Sometimes it takes a while for her to come to terms with needing more help than she’s needed in the past.

For caregivers in Mt. Laurel, NJ, and the surrounding areas, call and talk to us at Home to Stay Healthcare Solutions (856) 321-1500.

Andrew Dubler

Home to Stay Health Care Solutions (H2S) is a solutions minded, non-medical home care company enabling seniors and disabled members of our community to stay at home.
Home to Stay Senior Care Solutions is owned and operated by the Dubler and Skole Families and was started because of experiences they had with their own Families. In one situation Mom was living alone and had a fall. It was not until this fall that the family realized they were unprepared.

When it was time for their Mom to come home, she needed companion and personal care to assist her and prevent another accident. Like most people in this situation, they were confused and did not know where to go for help. It was this life-changing experience that lead to starting a home care company that is focused on enabling those who wish to stay at home and age in place.
Andrew Dubler